Year 2009 in Review

in a split second, 2-0-0-9 will close it's curtain and the rest like they say is history.

2009 has been THE YEAR for me thus far in my life, this is where i stepped my mark and actually am facing the world, the reality.

it's the year i officially finish my studies and graduated with a degree that i wanted to do all this while.

it's the year i had the chance to travel abroad, learning different culture and experience the differences these world has to offer.

it's the year, i finally get to visit the stadium of manunited.. dream realized...

it's the year where reunion, meetups and everything is ever possible.

it's the year i finally secured a full-time job with a decent salary and giving me an opportunity for a whole new experience.

all in all. this has been a great year.. A year to cherished and remember for a very long time.

To a great year 2010 ahead and may all of us have a blessed one!

2-0-0-?

it;s few more days to end of 2009.. sad and happy but nevertheless it was/has been a good year.

buhbye year 2009. wish 2010 a good one! =)

will update if i do have time, else.. will explain more when everything is settled down!

travel log

in the midst of clearing up pictures from my laptop and decided to put my memories in pictorial.. it's been a good year and looking towards a brand new 2010.. ;)

my previous travel log stops at my visit to leeds for the educational trip on aqua vermi ponics. after leeds, we make our way to blackburn and the journey throughout was good.. all of us were hungry and decided to stop at the rest area along the highway for lunch.

of course being at the land, where fish and chip is their typical food like rice is to us.. we ordered fish and chip.. only to realize that fish n chip may no longer be associated with england as chicken tikka masala is fast becoming the nation's favourite... 

we continued the journey to blackburn and went to this shop where 2nd hand shoes is really at a bargain price.. found and got myself a pair of flat that cost 99pence.. 

we then navigate our way to cumbria looking for the place where we are having our nite there.. it;s a countryside place.. really out of city with beautiful and awesome scenery.. mountains, stones and lamb, of course...

after that we went out to search for our dinner.. u'll be surprised how many ppl were there at the country side and almost every restaurant are fully booked.. we search deep inside.. and finally found a restaurant with the name of 'The Fat Lamb'.. as the name of the restaurant, of course.. i ordered lamb steak as my dinner.. nice.. nice..

other dishes.. and a dessert.. pudding rhabab... ( dunno the spelling) but it's really nice and a seasonal vege that only grows in the spring.., if i;m not mistaken.. 

fat lamb... we headed back to the rest hse and call it a day..

the next morning.. we had typical English breakfast before checking out.. and headed to the nearby place for a trout fishing.. dr hakimi taught me how to fish as i never fish before.. 

so there i was.. with rod in my hand.. and then flung that rod to the lake and waiting for the trout to eat my bait.. waiting.. waiting.. and voila, suddenly i feel this heavy strength of thingy bitting my rod.. i quickly ask for help.. and as advice by dr hakimi, i managed to wind back the rod slowly.. and i saw the trout flipping here and there.. with a stick in dr's hand.. he beat the fish to death.. and slowly taking the fish out from the hook.. 

me with my catch of my life. hahaha.. 1st time fishing.. i think i would love fishing now. even if i dun get to catch any fish.. i think it's a wonderful experience.. and fishing is actually a way to teach us about life.. and how we must be patient and perseverance does pay off... ;)

with the rod.. and the trout fishing owner...

after trout, we were on our way to lake district.. on the way, we saw lots of windmill along the highway and that kind of remind me of teletubbies.. so peace and serene..

at lake district.. and my north england trip came to an end.. we then headed to Lancaster for a while and straight back to Manchester...

another nite in Manchester before we flew back to Germany.. 

I would surely visit england again next time.. and of course..to watch Manchester United live in Old Trafford!!!

evolving.. revolving.

i hate the fact that i can be real happy and the next second.. i could be very emo. 

i hate the fact that (not rejecting but merely asking for a reschedule interview because i cant make it for the interview 2moro because i am having a meeting with the managers and i cant freaking abandoned that).. so i am plea-ing for that person to call me back for a reschedule because that is my dream company and still is.. the place i wanted so bad in the 1st place. sil vous plait, call me back!!! i am waiting for that calll.. 

i am having a difficult time thinking because my work laptop got crashed last week with the reasons i do not know and don't want to know and i feel like an idiot because not having my laptop around means i cannot work which makes people around me looking at me (that interprets that i am either stupid or an idiot and makes them thinking that i know nothing about computer that it got crashed barely 2 months since i got hold of it).. it sickened me because 

a) i am not a person who do not know anything about computers because i know how to format and know how to fixed motherboard, graphic cards, ram, hard disk, sound card and whatever shit into the CPU)

- sometimes it's better to left everything unsaid so that i can act like i am stupid and not one will ever ask me.. cause they know they will only get 1 answer from me.. which i.. I DO NOT KNOW.. SORRY..

b) i wanted to do give my best and all to my current job but people just don't give me the chance at all..

- so it's better that i just do what i can and look things at the smaller scale... the more i think, the more i get demoralised and hopeless on my current situation.

i want to be a volunteer for a NGO and am trying to look for ways to help them out.

i realized that i have so many stuff that i wanted to post up for year 2009 but i just couldnt find a decent way to put it here.. and as a reminder that 2009 was a ending and start to a brand new aspect of my life.

i have so many things going round my head but i just couldnt put them into words here.

praying that next week is going to be a good week ahead and that i have the strength to face people that i have to face weekly.. and please dun make my new week  miserable. thank you.

life

life can be real short, sometimes you wonder what can be done, yet we sometimes postpone doing things that we can finish instantly.
and then we only reflect back with regrect things that we didnt do.
i hope this is a lesson learnt for me to do things i wanna do now rather than postponing it.

a month to not whine but rather producing results. and hoping for the best to come. ;)

Octo.. Octo

it's the end of a glorious month; already. time flies..
and i am so looking forward towards the end of the year.
and planning ahead of course, towards a brand new year.. ;)

i breeze thru whole of last week without my boss around.. and then this week was only working for 3 days.. and 2 days off.. how perfect to end this month.

i cant wait for another month to start. come whatever challenge that is being given.. i will ease thru and hopefully begin to adapt to working life..

and to the beautiful skies above.. i so love the fact that the earth colours of blue, green and white certaily cures your unhappiness away.. looking things at the bright side, patience and perseverance..

routine gets going again

how am i happy looking forward to weekends on friday and when weekday comes again.. i sigh.. and the routine will continue again. 

i hate this feeling.. and i am having this conflicting emotions with myself lately. 

i dunno what is going on and i hope this feeling will go away pls...

am trying to learn everything by heart and i plead that people will give me more time to prove it..

enough said. 2moro is working day again and i hate the fact that this 1 week will be one hell roller coaster week.. TIME, please pass by very very fast this week.. will u? thank you.

going down memory lane

I was looking thru my high school magazine of Year 2005 and i found pages on "a look inside the mind of a georgian"..
and then all the memories kept coming back.. i wish i could just go back one day and experience the life of a high school student again.. those were really the good-old-days of my teenage years.
so at that particular page.. i found questions that were asked to the former georgians..
here it is...
1) Can you give 3 words to describe St. George's?
--my high school..

2)Who was your favourite teacher?
-- have a few.. mr ang who was my bm and form teacher for three years.. but i think i would have to give it to Miss LKY.. the maths teacher i had in F2.. who never fails to give us much hwork and of course.. did scolded me ones and i had to apologise to her.. i wonder where is she now???

3) What was your favourite food in the school canteen?
-- no need to hesitate.. definitely surely is Pak Ali's food.. u can never ever forget the nasi goreng, nasi lemak and NASI AYAM on TUESDAY!!!!! until those tender ruins the canteen stall owner.. grrr...

4) Draw yourself as a georgian...
- hehee.. cant draw rite now.. next time..

5) Which place in school was your favourite spot?
- in front of koperasi.. or somewhere quiet..

6) What was your ambition when you were a student, and what are you working as now?
- to be involved in media line.. but currently not.. but am chasing my dreams.. =))

7) How has being a Georgian influenced your life?
- just proud to be one.. what was taught in school still remains freshly in my mind..

----i never stepped back into high school ever since i graduated from there 4 years ago.. i would want to visit it one day... i kind of miss the frens and everything..


seniors and juniors, all gathered here..
together we march on without a fear,
goodwill and happiness we want to spread,
everyday's a challenge,
let's go right ahead,
onwards we move, towards the light,
resolved are we to face the fight,
giving our best,
from day to day,
if there's a will, there's always a way,
around the bends of life we'll have to turn,
near and far fond thoughts will always burn,
St George's St George's will ever proclaim,
Honour and uphold you forever praise your name..
St George's St George's,
will always be true,
OUR DEAR St George's Girls' School...
(i hope i got that right)...
imagine we sang this song.. almost everyday with lagu negeri and bahasa jiwa bangsa..
how time flies....=)

life minus work

all recent post have been about work and all.. but NO. this is not going to be an emo post. 

although work is not fun as i wanted it to be.. but life without work is rather awesome.. i attended high school form 5 reunion, form 6 reunion, going out with bunch of my closest friends, cousins, special thanks to ms lee for listening to all my ramblings during lunch time, attended raya celebration at my coursemate hse in seberang jaya, the awesome mee udang tat her mum cooks, thanks so much.. u know who u r =), bday celebration with friends of mine and not to forget my family who have been really supportive of wat i do..

thanks everyone.. all those happiness really make me cherish u ppl around.. thanks much everyone.. =)

grant me a wish

yes, please.. if i could just make a special wish this month, please fast forward the time to Aug2010. fast please. i am begging....

i am stranded here with no direction and people here are not at the same thinking level as i am. 

if i were to be stuck here any longer, i wonder how would i become..

why are ppl so contented to be where they are.. it is not that they cant dream.. 

Yes, u may dream.. but make you sure you work hard enough to realised your dream.

I, wont be the same as them. 

thank you. august 2010.. please... 

thankyou.danke.merci.gracias.xiexie.kamsia.terimakasih.

true, =)

You are in a state of constant expectation and want interesting and exciting things to happen to you. (very true)
But in fact, you are a 'Walter Mitty' at times - a dreamer - over-imaginative and often given to fantasy or day-dreaming. There is nothing wrong in 'dreaming' - how boring life would be if one just followed the doctrines of everyday life - but one must not continue leading a life of continuous fantasy. You need to face reality in spite of all its possible shortcomings. (yeah, i know.. but couldnt help it)
You are lazy - you dream of a peaceful, calm, uncluttered and uncomplicated life. Your ideal would be to share a permanent base with some person or persons who would be able to demonstrate on-going love, peace and security. (eerr.. i disagree.. i dont think so..)
You feel truly deprived - not getting your fair share, but you have accepted the fact that that is the way things are at this time and that it is prudent to let matters slide and not hit your head against the wall -so conform and agree for a while. Accept the situation - nothing can last forever. (agree, couldnt be more true for my current situation)
You are feeling trapped by the situation as it stands at this time and what is more, you feel powerless to remedy it. You are stressful, angry and disgruntled. You feel that everything that you try to do to change the situation is thwarted and your hopes and aspirations all seem to be receding into the ever distant future. You have reached the state where you now doubt whether your dreams will ever be achieved and this is not only causing mental stress but heartache. You need to get away from it all - you need to have time to think, to recuperate, to be able to make your own decisions. (meaning to say i will not stay long? muahahaha; JK)
You don't like conflict and you endeavour to avoid criticism. You want to do your own thing and to be able to decide what is right for you. You have considerable personable charm - and this is used with considerable effect on those that keep your company.

crying does not solve my problems. I need to be firm and be strong to overcome everything that it's being thrown at me.. (pyscho-ing myself that i will be fine) *fingers crossed*

numb as it feels

it's been almost a month since i started working. i know i should at least update a bit... but i choose to let this little ramble space of mine blank. i dunno wat to write.. happy that i started working? to be honest the answer is a big NO NO.. i dunno why... i couldnt even feel that i like my job. i am tyring to like it but to be honest, i cant.. everytime i tried to ask ppl things i dunno.. i just get ignored.. or they will have this look stamped at their face "how come is this girl so stupid".. so many terms i don't understand.. and everytime i tried to ask around.. people will look at me as if i am dumb.. so wat if i am dumb damm it.. screw you ppl who dont even wanna teach me when i asked.. you guys have been working there for freaking years compared to me who is working less than a month.. of course there are many many things that i dunno... so who to blame? me myself? i am really trying but you people around never give me the chance to learn. I never wanted to give up easily without trying.. but everytime i tried so hard.. i am falling even further.. and questioning myself day by day.
grrrr... somebody.. save me... =(
let me give another month a go.. before i decide on something else...

painstaking decision

after more than a week of contemplating.. i have come to make a decision. I hope it is the best choice i have make now. sigh. and wat a way to mark my decision day when i was handled a piece of summon by the police. damm it.. grr.. wonder it is a blessing in disguise.. arghh..

there are more interviews i wanted to go and try out.. but the "what if" question pop to my mind.. what if i rejected this.. and i wont get tat.. what if this is what i want.. and if i rejected it.. will i still have the chance??.. so many questions to ponder upon.. even after i have made the decision.. still.. there is 2 more interview i would like to go.. damm it.. hopefully i wont regret this.. haihs..

I will start working this Tuesday and yeah, it is not my field of study.. i guess some of you might have know it already.. IT's in PENANG and I am staying put here at the moment.. I shall give it one year to try out.. if all else fail.. and that i cannot perform.. i will be going back into my field of study.. *fingers crossed*...

and i can only hope for the best after making this decision.. i know this is NOT what i wanted.. but it's the BEST at the moment.. considering that i basically know what direction i want to go to, for the next 3 years time. =)

september already

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends
here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

it;s the last quarter of the year already and yet i have not made up my mind.. very indecisive of me.. but anway, i will will will finalize everything by this weekend and go for IT.

so many things to write... yet when i click on the new post button.. it's as if everything i wanted to write here. disappear from my mind..

to stay in penang or to go over to kl.. this two places is in my mind for weeks already. I wish was was more firm, determined and decisive. but yet i am so frail, weak and so indecisive to make a decision.

until a decision is made.. let's hope to a beginning of a good month.. and joy! =)

Educational Learning Experience

when i was in manchester back in june.. i went for some visiting trip with sakiinah's parents and it was one fruitful learning trip.. one tat i will remember and hope to be able to share some information that i learnt from the experience.



the pictures above was taken 7am in the morning.. in front of the University of Manchester hostel.. where i curi tinggal.. it was good and truly an experience to be able to stay there for 2 nites.. since it was the end of semester already, there were many parties going on.. it looks scary cause i havent seen any scenario like tat in our country before.. everyone dress up and get into the mood of partying wee midnite.. while we were walking back from our dinner cum supper.. so many beggars on the road and even waiting to pounce on the leftovers and asking for money.. it was real scary.. and people driving in the car honking and screaming at your direction and everything weird plus the cold weather at nite..



so my 2 nights in manchester included shopping and of course. touring manunited stadium.. the third day was reserved for a road trip up north england.. but before that we stopped by Leeds to visit an intergrated fish farming place.. my 1st thought was tat.. how the people managed the place and seeing how they actually work the farming thingy out... the place, located very inside.. near to hills.. away from Leeds' town.. my bad.. as i cant really remember the place really well..



boy was i wrong went i step into tat place.. it was nice and peaceful.... we were then introduced to the person in charged, Alberto who briefed us everything about the place.. later only did we know that educating troubled kids, or young teens with juvenile cases is one of their long term plan to curb these kids from going into the wrong path in life. most of these kids have problems at home.. and these leads them into thinking that they are unwanted, useless, wortheless and lacking of love from their parents - more children and teenagers are prone to taking drugs, stealing and etc.. with initiative taken.. this 'troubled kids' is getting a chance to learn things tat they might not learn in the classroom.. they are given the chance to go into farming, gardening and many more..



some of the plants and fishes in the green house...according to alberto.. many of these kids.. have not even seen a fish in their life.. and all of them who came here.. have the oppurtnity to touch and feed the fishes.. by interacting with the fishes.. these kids feel warmer and become "soften" at heart.. as they feel at peace communicating with the fishes..

organic strawberry.. with a very good watering system..

tomatoes... very very delicious..

this is the worms.. i forgot the name, the types already.. my bad..but the soil is very good.. and the worms are really fat!

outside the green house.. vegetables are plant around..

see the bamboo watering system on the top right hand.. i personally like tat one very much.. =) and on the down left hand corner is the chairs and tables made by the students who go there for the classes and etc..

After hours spent in the place.. i actually got to know how life it is for the hard ones and the one tat is not portrayed by the mainstream media.. what we are only seeing sometimes is the luxury of others and yet there are so many unfortunate people out there regardless of where they live... be it in the developed country or undeveloped country..everyone just want to achieve something in life to be proud of and be happy.. yet this simple and easy task is so hard to be accomplish... when we get something.. we want more.. and that's where greed comes in.. and we are so not easily satisfied..

What is the meaning of life anyway?

sometimes.. it leads me to think that money is not everything and i am not supposed to be choosy.. but yet in life we are so into material stuff that we forgot that when you have the basic necessities (you can eat, 'shit' [sorry for the harsh, rude word, cant thing of any...] and sleep) it's all enough.. without these 3 basics stuff.. you cant go anywhere..

decision, option, changes

it has been a roller coaster 2 weeks for me.. after convocation.. i went straight to kl.. tat is for some short vacation.. seeing around kl.. visiting museum, petrosains, skybridge.. and what not..

then i came back.. got phone calls for me to attend interview..

so i went again this week.. came back late last nite.. and i got one job offer.. and i am comtemplating whether to take it or not.. it's in bukit jalil.. but will require me to travel around kl, pj quite often.. so meaning.. i have to bring car down to kl.. then rental.. and then food.. and petrol.. it is certainly not cheap.. but the prob is.. it is quite like a job i have been looking for.. and it is a field which i really wanna go into it. haihs.. should i go for the job because i like it? or should i consider all those break down of expenses?? damm it.. i hate decisions.. when i didnt get any jobs yet.. i will be looking for jobs.. then when finally i got an offer.. there are so many other things to think about.. i hate making decision.. and i never will get the right on..

but anyway, i am welcoming back a friend of mine from germany...

this was taken in penang airport on 1st march 2009.. let's see how she look like when is she back.. whheeeeee...

Barclays Premier League 2009/2010

today marks the start of the 2nd season of the Barclays Premier League, formerly known as the English Premier League. 

i am sure many would make predictions of the outcome.. and of course i am too..

i would of course wanna see my fave team winning it for the 4th consecutive time.. but i am not sure if they could do it or not.-minus ronaldo and tevez.. i am sure we will bounce back.. but not so fast this season.. i just think it might be a rebuilding this season to be prepared for the 2010/2011 season.. and loooking at the transfer of players for the big four club( mu, ars, chel n liv).. i would say that Chelsea are the strongest favourite to win.. followed by manu, arsenal and liverpool.. and i wont be surprise if arsenal can spring something up =).

Hope that come May next year.. we will know who the winner is.. but of course.. hope that it will be an entertaining new season.. =)

mix boiling point

*this is an emo post and truly from my heart.. if i did offend anyone.. am sorry.. i didnt mean to.. again.. it;s everything that i pour out from my heart..**

it was an emotional 2/3 days.. mix with happy, sad and excited feelings.. and it's hard to explain.. one moment i would be grateful, the other i will be rebellious, and crying and enjoying and many stupid mix feeling boiling inside me..

to tell the truth, i am missing lots of my 10 weeks life back in germany.. i like the living lifestyle over there... and i wish i could have tat again.. it hurts tat i am back here in malaysia and yet i cant find myself.. although it's hard adjusting to climate, culture there at first.. but at the end i got used to it already and i wish how 10 weeks would go by really slow.. but again.. i have enjoyed the time there.. i know i should not look backward.. i should look forward.. if i ever have a choice.. i would choose to go away from home and try to explore more about the world..

i am ever growing frustrated with my progress in looking for a job.. seriously.. there is not even one phone call or anyone calling me to attend interview after so many countless applications i have submitted.

i look like an idiot looking for jobs.. i dunno why..i dunno wat qualities employers are looking into... how do i secure a job? and etc.. it's been really frustrating.. i hate tat feeling.. but tat again. if i ever get a job.. will tat job be in the career path tat i want?? should i just look for a part time job 1st and take my time to look for the job i really really want?? arghhh.. i wish i have answers to all my queries..

i am ever excited for my own convocation.. yet for the fact tat many of my frens have managed to get a job and working and looking happy and all.. deep inside, i am happy for them but at the sametime i cant help for the fact tat it is so hard for me to find a job... i have been keeping a positive mindset but my heart is very fragile.. and sometimes when my heart cant take it anymore.. i break down.. all alone by myself crying.. it's been hard to put on a brave front facing so many people tat once i'm all alone.. all the negativity comes in.. and tat is the breaking point.
but for the time being.. to be honest i am thinking of taking up the work and travel program and to explore different things in life rather than the conventional working life.. where i will go to work and the routine and mundane life continue again and again and again daily. and then i thought of taking up postgraduate studies overseas and work my way up again..
again, tat is just what i am thinking right now.. but still there are many things that is not conclusive yet.. unless i can land a job soon.. then every doubt will be put to rest.. else.. i must have a contingency plan for everything..

favourite team lost in charity shield to chelsea.. on penalties.. but am hoping for a competitive 2009/2010 premier league season, plenty of tennis and of course the World Badminton Championship this week..

pic OF the WEEK

lit, i reproduced this pic from your blog.. hehehe.. 

it's nice. and it capped a nice nite i had this week. =)

Changes

You can change your hair,
You can change your clothes.
You can change your mind,
It's just the way it goes.
You can say goodbye and you can say hello.
But you'll always find your way back home.
You can change your style,
You can change your jeans.
You can learn to fly,
And you can chase your dreams.
You can laugh or cry,
Like everybody knows.

You'll always find your way back home.

(from Hannah Montana The Movie , You'll always find your way back home)

it was one of hannah's episode showed on Disney Channel tat led me to go online to listen to the movie soundtrack.. and then i got addicted and went online to watch the movie. The movie was ok.. not bad.. but what i like the most was the lyrics from few songs in the movie. 

and then it made me realised how many things i missed out cause i wasnt looking forward for something new.. but i was literally missing things that was from the past..

"Often we look so long so regretfully upon the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us." ~Helen Keller~

Congratulations!

Two of my close friends got a job this week. I am so absolutely happy for them! i know they have really searched hard to find the job and i wish them the VERY best. I really hope their career will spark off from this job. Congratulations once again!!!

As for me, i am still searching for the right one. I will never know which is the right career path for me to go to .... and i'm actually kind of relaxing and taking things slowly. I am glad that both my parents are understanding enough and did not push/nagged me into getting a job quick. but it is me who is pressuring my ownself sometimes. but anyway, i just learnt a sentence today, no matter how sad or happy life is, life still has to go on. so why not put a smile on the face everyday and make everyday a happyday =)

right now, i am actually sick.. i dunno why.. but everyyear around the month of july/august, i will fall sick once..dunno why. so here am i again.. at home.. doing nothing n resting lor.. with crysanthemun drink tat i boiled, a book on "How to do everything with MOffice", and wonderful songs to cheer me on the friday afternoon..

you tell, you made, you deliver!

so many things to write but my mouse spoiled on me and i havent buy a new one yet. will get one real soon. mouse is like my right hand.. myassist.. it's so hard losing it.. i wanna post more pictures here.. but without a mouse.. i cant edit the pixies to put it up.. but THE hardest is to lose someone than anything else..
Makes me ponder upon.. what life really is? i was saddened by the death of Yasmin Ahmad. She was(so bad to use tat past tense) and still is my favourite film director in malaysia. I was having this dream of working with here someday. but now it will just remain being unfulfilled dreams.But god is good, she will not suffer thru the pain she gone thru.. god brought her back earlier as she have done what she have to do in this world. may you rest in peace and hopefully may we be gifted with a talented person like you again=)
i only met her once and listening to what she said was just marvellous. i even recorded the talk tat she gave and wat she siad will be a good piece of advise to me.. one advise tat i will remember forever....

a peek into an unemployed life

so u know you are the above when u are so free with nothing to do and ended up chatting and watching television all the time.. or even better.. sleeping all the time.. why? simple because u dun have the money to go out and that going out for once will burn a hole in your pocket. 

i am not complaining la.. cause i did not make any effort to look for a job also.. so who to blame rite.. me myself lor. 

Currently i am following  TVB new series,  Burning Flame 3.. and up to EP14 d.. and u know wat.. i dun like the story line on why Wong Hei's character is being portrayed as if he is so weak, annoying, perfectionist and all.. and that Kevin Cheng get to be the man. the HERO all the time.. other than tat.. it's ok.. but why do u have to sacrifice everything to make Kevin the MAN!!!

and u know wat.. i just got an idea on how to write to apply for a job in my so called dream company... it's crazy.. i know.. but i will just give it a try.. it will not be the formal one.. but it will be a crazy one. I have been figuring and drafting how to write it.. all is in my mine.. when i finally pen in down.. and if i EVER did get an interview or something.. i will write something here.. else.. it's a secret between me and tat company which i would want to submit my application. hahahahaha. 

on other note, convocation is set to be on Wednesday, 12 August , 3pm.

speechless, yet am writing..

i was on a week holiday in KL.. main reason being that i went there solely to watch Manchester United Live in Action at Stadium Bukit Jalil. but that is not the main talking point of the entry today.

rather.. while i was in KL, i was disconnected from the internet, newspaper n all.. i know.. being in the city.. i was and should have exposed myself more to the news surrounding.. but the place i was staying with my cousin did not have internet connection and that i wasnt bothered to buy a newspaper. I did saw a few times when i passed by the newspaper stand and saw some tall building and pictures of people crying. later did i only know that, a person is death and he was found dead outside the building of MACC.. and damm sad right.. he was just like us, any ordinary malaysian who was summoned for questioning by the authority. and then he came out dead. i dunno what happened but my immediate thinking was; he was murdered..

it doesnt make sense at all on why would he kill himself while he have a fiancee and an unborn child waiting for him.. to start a family.. it was so tragic... and as for his mohther, losing his son in this manner is such a horror.. i think that was the grief i felt when i saw all the newspaper and seeing his mother so distraught on the tv. 

what have our nation become? i dare not think..when people asked me.. what is good about your country? i just got stucked there.. i dunno wat to answer.. i would want to say something nice and good but my heart doesnt say so.

i am just speechless, clueless to say anything.. those happy moments i had for a week in KL just go down like tat. may u rest in peace.. TBH.. 

daily chores

Dear Diary,

I have been doing things for the past 2 weeks but somehow i feel the things i have been doing is not productive enough.

Let me see what have i done..

a) watching tv which includes everything from news, drama, cartoons and sports.

b) back-up all my photos in the cd from 2002 till present... thousands of memories flow back.. it was so good!

c) reconstructing resume and cover letter for jobs application. 

d) wash clothes and unpack stuff from luggage

e) combining various pictures to print out .. and still counting.. almost 300++ pixies now.. 

f) reading books on branding

g) learning to use microsoft office in more detail

h) playing PSP

i) cooking

j) going out with frens..

k) makan and makan and makan.

put on weight lately.

on another note, my convo is on 12th Aug(wed) 3pm. 

i am graduating.. putting on the robe and all but somehow.. i am not even excited on the prospect of convocation as i think there are still something out there which are more important than this.

since i am so free, i have been doing lots of thinking.. sometimes negative stuff just hit your mind and you just cant imagine how something bad could turn to disaster and wondering how good things can become even better things.. why are things happening like this and not like that?

anyway, i decided to let go the usm offer to further master and i am glad i did that. i do not think it was a bad decision though. I feel i need that working experience to bring me forward. I also believe that i can get a job that i really want and i would take my time. No one is putting the pressure on me except my ownself. so, let me just lay back.. take my time to learn some skills like photoshop-ing, illustrat-ing, microsoft office-ing and all before i really really berjaya untuk menghadapi dunia luar yang memang kejam... jadi saya hanya boleh mempersiapkan diri saya sebaik yang mungkin.

apa yang akan berlaku kelak berada di luar kawalan saya.. saya hanya membuat yg terbaik.

sekian sahaja rentetan saya kali ini. saya akan pergi ke satu escapade hujung minggu ini untuk merehatkan minda.. sehingga berjumpa lagi..

have a nice weekend.. 

Bon-weekend..

Another Epic Wimbledon Final

I watched last year Wimbledon men singles final where roger federer lost to rafael nadal. And this year, he was playing second best to Andy Roddick.. but unfortunately for Andy Roddick.. one mistake.. and roger federer won.. in another epic 5 sets thriller.. 5-7, 7-6, 7-6, 6-3 and 16-14. 

it was really really an incredible game of tennis.. I was rooting for Roger Federer all this while and i felt sad for roddick for he played a magnificient game. he was really unlucky. He should have won the tiebreak on the 2nd set.. but he blew his chances away. I think the 2nd set was the turning point and federer gain momentum from there.. and won it.. of course.. roddick didnt give up though.. he came back in the fourth set and managed to break federer to win 6-3 on the fourth set.. then on the final set. you can see that both were very strong.. physically and mentally. no one wanted to give in.. federer could not even break on roddick's serve and it looks more likely that roddick will win they game. Unfortunately.. towards the 3oth game.. after 4 hr..15mins on court.. Federer finally managed to break roddick. and championship point to roger federer. 

Federer was again delighted.. and now crowned wimbledon champion for the 6th time and become the GREATEST Player EVER in tennis history.. surpassing Pete Sampras record of 14th major... 15th Major for Roger Federer... and hopefully counting =).. when he lost out on last year wimbledon.. more doubt whether he could come back stronger to win another major again.. and then came the US Open... he won against andy murray.. it was his 13th major.. then australian open.. he lost in the final to nadal.. but still he came back to win the French Open, finally won the only grandslam he have not won before.. so there was it.. his 14th Grandslam.. and now, of course.. winning the Wimbledon 2009 to take his tally to 15th Grandslam and thus becoming THE greatest tennis player of all time. What a magnificent athlete he is.. Congratulations, Roger Federer..

and to Andy Roddick. i really do feel sorry for him.. He was really the better player today.. but luck was not on his side... he lost it.. but i think he would come back stronger and hopefully try to win another grandslam again. All the Best.

so there you go.. my 2 weeks of glu-ing myself in front of the TV watching Wimbledon..and of course.. due to the time different.. i have to stay up till wee morning watching it.. but it was good nonetheless... =)

on another note, i actually did attend a job interview.. i went for the 2nd intw with the MD.. but sadly i did not go well prepared.. it was my fault.. (i went with the mentality.. if i didnt get the job.. never mind.. i just am going for fun and experience).. and of course.. it back-fired on me.. i was low on confidence, nervous and everything negative.. i should have done better. i am at fault cause i think i would have gotten the job had i did research on the theory side.. sigh.. sigh.. but i shall learnt from this and improved myself.. i really regretted it.. and wat the MD said.. is still very very fresh in my mind.. sigh.. 

again now.. i really really dunno what i want in life.. all this while.. i though i knew what i want.. but now.. i am in dilemma again.. and not knowing where i would go from here.. sigh..  i have to come back stronger and job hunt again. =)

Nobody?

this few days i was reading the news on how my favourite football club has money to spend on ronaldo's transfer to real madrid..  but sadly there are no one to be bought. i thought that was rather funny. and madrid keep on buying players like there are no more players in the team anymore.. you tell me..?? buying so many superstars in a team of only 11 people who can play in the pitch at one time.. how can you dump all inside the starting eleven?? funny la.. and to have all superstars playing together?? i doubt it la.

and why are the media making a big fuss towards manunited??? i still believe in ferguson.. even though the departure of ronaldo did leave a BIG or rather HUGE gap. i do not think it's time to panic and fuss about. stay calm and cool.. buying a no name player is good... after all.. who would have heard about cristiano ronaldo 6 years ago.. it was then Ferguson who turn him into one of the best footballer in the modern era.. why cant ferguson buy someone who is inexpensive and again turn him into a superstar.. then of course spending less money.. and to groom the player into a superstar.. and sell at a higher price.. is also a good business.. =)

i still believe and confident manunited will make it through the next season.. if they dont win anything. then consider it as a rebuilding season.. like the economics.. there are alwiz up and down.. so why fuss?? and i doubt madrid will be good either.. so many superstar.. how do you control them??.. with so many ego-maniac.. and ronaldo is one of the example.. 

anyway, i am excited to be going down to KL to watch manunited in action.. although there will be no ronaldo.. there are other players worth to watch.. and hopefully ferguson managed to finalised his team before the start of 2009/2010 season.. best of luck!!!

i am so reluctant to find a job and start working.. why d fuss to be hurry finding a job... i still wan my own little time..=)

A Week After

I am back in Penang for almost a week d. It has been a busy one week with coping of the jetlag at the same time. Partly thanks to our dear Malaysia Airlines for delaying my flight in Frankfurt airport and i was stuck there for almost 13 hours. damm it. i wanted to write something good about Malaysia Airlines but what happened when i touched down in Penang just change it.. because my luggage was tempered.. and that my lock was cut off and my zip was not there anymore. stupid things must have happened in KLIA. DAMM IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so after a week back here. i realised that some things changed and some things don't.. but the weather of course has been really really HOT with the hazy skies...

and after a much much consideration and going from one department to another department.. i finally decided not to pursue my master's degree and yes, i am officially jobless. but i am in no hurry to find a job as i am taking this time to enjoy and relax 1st. 

screw you ppl who asked me questions that sound so panicky and what not... i have my own life and of course i have my plan drawn out.. so please.. dun ask me crazy questions again. if i like i might answer your questions.. else.. you know why i dont answer questions.. enough said.

bis bald!

Trip to Manchester

I went for my much-awaited mini trip to Manchester. The return flight tickets from Airport Weeze(near Dusseldorf cost about 10.50 pounds). so there i was last thursday, excited to start my journey from germany to england. 

about 1.5 hours later, i arrived at the manchester airport. AWESOME-ness.. and then board a bus to the place where i am staying.

this pics above was taken in the city centre.. where we went for a walk and had brunch cum lunch before we headed to (my) very own must go place!!!=)

we had our food at RICE.. a place run by a korean, if i am not mistaken.. I had the Indian Kashmiri Lamb Chop that come with rice and salad. nice... with tea, it is 6.5pound

and the next thing on the MUST GO list is to board a bus from the city centre to Old Trafford, the Stadium of Manchester United football club.. when the bus got nearer.. i got so excited.. and more excited! cant believe that i actually is there already.. the feeling was really surreal...

and of course many pictures taken.... how could any fan resist that.. it was really really good.. i would wish tat i would be able to watch a match here one day... *fingers crossed*

i think the above picture was taken in the north stand of the stadium..

inside the stadium touring...

the 2 pictures above was at the Hall of Fame.. the 18 premier league trophies that have been won.. and counting... =)

inside the stadium..

outside the stadium.. i think it is either on the west or south stand of the stadium

touring the museum..

yeah.. arguably the BEST player in the world.. who is leaving manunited for real madrid.. he didnt want to stay.. so no point of letting him stay and see his individualistic character than be a team player.. off you go to real madrid and wish you all the best.. but mind you ronaldo, those who leave manunited will never have a good career anymore.. see beckham n nistelrooy for example.. so just go.. we can find a better player that Sir Alex can groom..THERE is NO PLAYER BiGGER THAN THE CLUB!

and on the left is the trophies he won.. and on the right is wat Sir Matt Busby said.. "I never wanted MU to be second to anybody.. Only the best would be good enough".. and that is a reminder for you cristiano ronaldo.. you are leaving the best.. and you would be second.. muahahahahaha..

after the tour for almost 3 hours, we headed to the Trafford center and walk around for a moment.. before going back to Piccadily..

and went shopping around arndale.. and have a baked potato for tea...

then at nite for dinner.. we had a really nice meal in Kebabish.. food was really nice.. 

that is all for now.. too much pictures/// and too much things to explain.. will put the next day trip another time.. All for now..

unproductive

i wish i could be stronger but sometimes i couldnt.

no one will ever get to understand what i have been through.

my life is a big mess right now that i wish to dump the parts i dont want ,away.

i have been comtemplating whether i should or shouldnt I.

i just cant make decisions. i am indecisive.

i do not even know what i want. 

i hate it when people judge me not based on who i am but something else. 

i dont even know how will i ever find a job.

i dont even know who should i called as my friends or really friends?

i just dont know. 

but on top of all that i dont know.. I know that i will be back HOME soon enough to think of every other think that i dont know.

updates**

above 2 pictures was taken in the mediapark and the below 2 pics is taken in University of Cologne. 

This four pictures was taken in front of the famous Cologne Cathedral. It was really amazing!!!!

on the left was the cathedral, on the right is taken in the uni of cologne.

some random pictures taken in the town of Cologne.. See Louis Vuitton?? beside it was Lacoste

some pictures taken while the shooting was going on.

this pictures was taken in Bonn.. and i am in front of the Birth house of Beethoven! =)

some food we had in Siegburg.. and yummy yummy ice cream! wheeee..

so this is the only some short updates from me.. till then.. tschuss!!!!